Thursday, June 3, 2010

the hug


i dreamt last night
my father hugged me

we looked into each other's eyes
his wrinkled like mine
both of us smiling

appraising

"how are you?"
i asked him

"i'm well actually" he answered in his soft english accent, a sort of bemused smile
carrying the words into the realm of much more than sounds.

"you look tired", i added

"yes, it's hard work!"

i cried in my sleep

32 comments:

Jenny Stevning said...

What a beautiful post! The photo is amazing and the dream is deeply touching!

Joanna said...

What an evocative poem about a very personal dream. You are brave to bare your emotions this way Steven. I would love to have a dream like that about my mother.

Lorenzo — Alchemist's Pillow said...

23. I have decided for the sake of brevity and to avoid endless cloying repetition that "23" will be our code word for "This is absolutely beautiful, Steven". So 23.

I rarely if ever remember my dreams, but have on occasion had a similar experience of an unexpected encounter with a departed loved one. Of course, there is a sad side to those chance meetings, when we awaken it is as if we discover their absence anew, but, dreams being what they are, in those deep instants when the dream is the only reality we know, we are reunited. And that can be beautiful. And when described as you do here today ... 23.

ALeks said...

More hugs on their way,all over the big water,faraway,look up again and you will feel them!
Are you working to hard?
Take care.
Aleksandra

steven said...

hi jenny stevning - thanks for the kind comment!! have a peaceful day. steven

steven said...

ho joanna - it's intriguing to me that even though the dream world crosses over into the waking world, that we can't construct our dreamtime to inform our waking time. it would be so cool to get instruction, advice, understanding on a more regular basis! steven

steven said...

hi lorenzo - the remembered dreams i have are the most powerful dreams. i can recall them at any time. they are rare though. thanks for your generous and touching comment. steven

steven said...

aleks - i think i work too hard much of the time. what i'm finding as i get lder is that i know what's worth working on and can let the insignificant pieces take care of themselves or find a way to get them done that doesn't crush my spirit or my bodies' inclination to support my mind's intent! steven

Valerianna said...

Moving... and code 23!

Elisabeth said...

I missed your post yesterday, Steven. My server was down.

This is one of those wonderful dreams that give you hope in the possibility of reconnecting with the past. No wonder you cried in your sleep.

Sometimes I see my father in dreams but they are rarely dreams of reconciliation, but maybe one day...

willow said...

Thank you for a beautiful start to my day. xx

Bonnie, Original Art Studio said...

Jung believed that everything in our dream, on some level, represents us, the dreamer. Could it be possible that yourself was using your dear father to tell you that you are working hard and tired?

So tenderly presented steven.

ellen abbott said...

Oh man, steven. I wish my dad would come visit me.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Oh Steven - how beautiful and how sad too. But it is wonderful that you can dream of him - I rarely dream of loved ones and it really is a bonus to do so. Best wishes to you.

Richard Jesse Watson said...

Steven, that is beautiful and so moving. I only rarely have such dreams. To connect with love ones in a dream is a gift. My dreams are usually some attempt to deal with stress. Last night I had to score a goal on the Brazilian soccer team. I like your dream better.

Linda Sue said...

This "dream" is significant. I don't know what it's significance is other than encouragement and a "knowing" and that our work is not finished though our bodies may be- Your Father has a message to impart to his beloved son...only you know what that is. This is really lovely and strikes such a chord in me. Also leaves my vision blurry and a lump in the middle of my neck, I cannot swallow for some reason...I am effected, to my core, but don't know why.

hope said...

I liked your dream much more than mine.

Three weeks ago I dreamed that Auntie died on my vacation.

The vacation was last week. Auntie died toward the end of it. But oddly enough your photo gives me a sense of peace because her goal was to move heavenward.

And since she left, our mini-drought has ended; the skies often looking like those in your photo as it prepares to rain for the 4th day in a row.

Reya Mellicker said...

Tears come into my eyes as well. What a beautiful dream or visit or whatever it was. Ah your sweet father. May he fly high!

Titus said...

Oh steven, such beautiful words. And terribly moving for me, as I still sometimes dream, unbidden, of my father and wake up, grief-striken.

steven said...

thankyou valerianna!! steven

steven said...

elisabeth - i was very very fortunate to see my dad become a good guy over the course of his life. he was a good hugger eventually. steven

steven said...

willow thanks for being a part of the start of this day. steven

steven said...

bonnie - i know about and admire the work of jung. very much. when i offer intepretations of my children's dreams they hear those very words - no matter the character, the form that appears in your dreams - it's all a part of you. then there's more. but not here. not now. steven

steven said...

ellen - i know this is silly but there are days when i would wish for time with my dad. but it would be about satisfying my emotional needs and not about the real work that he and i have before us. but i get your drift. steven

steven said...

weaver thankyou for that sweet and thoughtful comment. have a lovely evening in the dale. steven

steven said...

richard - i'm english by birth - i'd love to score the world cup winning goal for england. i think they'll need it. but brazil! wow! there'd be a national day in your name, huge parties. you'd get every book you've ever illustrated enshrined in a real shrine!!! holy moley. steven

steven said...

see linda sue that's what i take out of this after i've done the jungian analysis. i know that work continues because the soul is being refined through its experiences - human or otherwise. it's manifestation in the great energy field of this place is part of its work. his work moved on to whatever or wherever he could refine the soul energy he manifests through. there's more but there are people better versed and more immersed to be able to share it. thanks so much for this comment. steven

steven said...

hope i'm sorry for your loss. your prescience is remarkable and not unexpected. sensitivity isn't a surface quality!! my father's flying away was as expected as it was unexpected. he worked towards that end. steven

steven said...

hey reya, there are dreams that step outside of dealing with the crap of daily life. the garbage dreams - and this was one that had presence and detail of a kind that made it entirely real. the soul that inhabited the role of my father cut through planes to reachme with goodness. thanks for the lovely comment. steven

steven said...

titus i miss my dad and i wish he could have put in more time here. but it was necessary for him to fly away when he did - and he knew it - so he did. but the very real sense of presence that a dream can give you - well it reduces you to a fairly raw emotional state. yes it does. steven

Dan Gurney said...

Dreams are such rich sources for inner work! Your dream about your dad is very moving, as others have said. Thanks for sharing; you're an inspiration to me. I'm looking forward to the summer, which begins the day after tomorrow for me, when I have more sleep, more dreams, and more time to contemplate them.

Pauline said...

this made my heart ache and smile at the same time. I sometimes dream of Mama that way - it seems so real, does it not?