In the evening we came back Into our yellow room, For a moment taken aback To find the light left on, Falling on silent flowers, Table, book, empty chair While we had gone elsewhere, Had been away for hours.
excerpted from "a light left on" by may sarton
you can wander and watch and wonder under all manner of skies and never know the unconditional love that is this place . . . the first condition of work . . . .
a respectful and considerate awe for my place in this wholeness.
“this is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. first to let go of life. finally, to take a step without feet.”
after difficult days or even on days when i feel the need to be as alone as alone can be simply so i can gather my self together . . .
i head to a cemetery near my school that has the otonabee river flowing right beside it . . . the trees, the sky, the river and the peacefulness never fail to heal . . .
thankyou with all that i am, to my amazing mum . . . who has taught me about love, care, kindness, generosity of spirit, patience, and especially about my work here - bringing whatever goodness i can, in the time i am given.
my classroom aquarium has five goldfish - designated "feeder fish" - i bought them a couple of years ago and paid a quarter a piece i think. they have lived in the class since then and each summer i put them in a tupperware container on the back of my bike and take them home to their summer aquarium. then i pack them back up in the fall and they head back to the more spacious accomodations of room 212!! the hearts - algae of course!!
i came across this self-portrait and recognized the man for who he is and even something of who he will become.
there is of course a space between those two states. i can tell you, he is acutely aware of what it will cost him to draw those two states together!
there is in him the capacity to effect change at a micro level right now. he teaches, he fundraises for a couple of very worthy causes. one a medical condition called huntington's disease, the other to support a small but healthy community in malawi.
that there is more possible and still to come is something he is entirely aware of.
what stands between him and that state?
faith, conviction, and time.
first to get his earthly matters into a form that supports this work to be becoming. and then? well the expansion of something he has known as a teacher for a number of years now . . .
i myself cannot articulate the form or features of the future becoming present beyond my knowing that my work to this point has been entirely worthy and good, while also knowing that it is a form of preparation for something that is already reaching back from the future and pulling me closer.
i heard the low hum of insect life, and felt the balmy air of a spring morning fanning my cheek. gradually it assumed a rhythmic flow, to whose soft pulsations my body seemed to respond.
the fifty five years and eight months old rider chugs north of peterborough with the wind behind him, knowing full well that as in life, the wind will be waiting for him when he turns back!!! no matter, it's too beautiful to get caught up in the wish i may wish i mights of life and riding. i look around and i see goodness and beauty! i thank God for that!